One year ago, we rode away from our wedding ceremony on mountain bikes, not certain what the future would hold.
Let’s be honest, we stopped for coffee just 10 miles into our 60-mile ride from Flagstaff to Sedona, Arizona. They say marriage is a marathon, but we had already been through an ultra-endurance mountain event!
Maybe you can relate. Maybe the journey to “the thing,” whatever it is for you, seems so long that you don’t know how it will unfold.
Our story is evidence that an all-powerful God knows how to crank the stories of our life.
How we Met: Starting at the Finish Line
I had recently crossed the finish line of a race and this tall guy wearing an Intel Jersey, looking like he had finished hours before me (swoon…fast guy), walked up. He asked if I had seen ‘Mike’, in a THICK accent (read: alluring)!
“No idea who Mike is, but where are you from?”. “California,” he responded, to which I quickly rebuked and said, “NO, where are you REALLY from?”
Under his breath, “Turkmenistan.”
Most people don’t even know that it’s a country, let alone where it is. But me?—I already had a love affair with Central Asia, therefore, major bonus points.
A Kink in the Hose
We were both working for Intel at the time. And as it often happens, once you meet someone, you suddenly spot them everywhere – primarily at the gym and yoga! While we were attracted to each other, our life philosophies were vastly different, making any kind of romantic relationship impossible.
Over the span of the next four years, we continued crossing paths, with enough interaction to make each of us want more. Yet the pressure in the garden hose was building, due to an obvious kink in it — Jesus.
That kink was not the easiest to undo on either of our sides. Bayram tried coming to church and tried to understand Jesus, but to no avail and no change. Blocked! Yet somehow throughout all this time, God kept rearranging things in such a way that one day the hose would get straightened.
The Un-Kinking
Several summers in a row we both made the three-hour trek to the mountains of Flagstaff on summer weekends. We would sleep in our cars, ride our bikes all morning and then find coffee shops and other haunts for the afternoon. Sometimes we would run into each other; other times we would avoid each other.
Both of us had somehow been accepted into the prestigious Leadville 100 mountain bike race–a demanding race with over 10,000 ft of climbing, all starting at over 10,000 ft altitude.
Both of us wanted to pre-ride the course. Since I was avoiding Bayram at the time, I did not consider making the long drive to Colorado with him. Yet in a turn of events, I got a concussion, and my parents didn’t want me driving. Somehow, that allowed me to rationalize that I should drive up WITH Bayram.
As we drove to Colorado, we started listening to an audiobook–Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. I assumed it would get shut down pretty quickly, but my surprise, he wanted to keep listening. In the story, Hudson Taylor has a breakdown. He has been living in inland China working as a medical doctor and minister. Conditions are extremely hard. His wife and children have already died from disease, and he is overworked. Somehow he takes the time to pause and listen to God. He realizes he can continue in God’s strength alone and is in fact energized by his time and relationship with God in a way he has never felt before.
I remember Bayram rewinding this portion of the book a few times. It somehow spoke to him. And I can’t tell you how, but by that same power that Hudson Taylor found, somehow Bayram had a new openness to learning about God.
Mountain Bike Chain Ring Proposal
It was Canada Day, and we had taken a long weekend trip – to Canada! We had just finished hiking almost every hike from Banff to Jasper. It was late in the day but still light. I plopped down in a rowboat and told Bayram I was just going to sit and think for a while.
He sat beside me and said “I’ll give you something to think about” and proceeded to pull out a 32T oval ‘chain’ ring and asked if I wanted to “lose some independence and be chained to him forever”.
Um… somewhat confused, I answered, “Yes, but all I can think of is ‘cranky’ things to say?” (Chainring goes on a bike crank).
I recovered though, and he did get down on one knee and asked me to marry him, noting that the 32T meant I didn’t have to wait till I was 33 (Also a step up from my MTB 30T).
A Picnicking Wedding
When it came to the wedding, we knew our wedding day was not going to be a “Traditional wedding.” We both love nature, being outside, having picnics, hiking, and biking! We also don’t like doing things “like everyone else,” preferring intimate settings over parties. So naturally, for our wedding, we chose to make our families hike out for a picnic.
The location had to be in Flagstaff (cuz mountains!) and had to include bikes (cuz hey, our story revolves around bikes). The original hike and picnic destination had to be changed last minute—as in the night before, which of course caused a bit of a hassle, but worked out just as well, maybe even better. I made flower crowns for all the ladies and my aunt was a champ and figured out how to pre-prepare and hike-in cheese boards and cakes with pansies.
You and Me Forever: Marriage in Light of Eternity
Instead of Vows, we chose to read a prayer back and forth. A prayer that we periodically repeat to remind ourselves of the real aim of our commitment.
God, help us to love You deeply and fear You greatly.
~Francis & Lisa Chan, You and Me Forever: Marriage in Light of Eternity
Teach us how to love each other for Your sake.
May the humility of Christ be seen in the way we treat each other.
Show us how to enjoy each other without neglecting Your mission.
Remind us of the brevity of life so we share Your good news urgently.
Remind us of heaven so we will face rejection and trials joyfully.
When we settle down for too long, prod us to run.
When we are prone to fight, teach us to fight together and, and to fight for You.
When we are tempted to run away, bring repentance and renewal.
May we spend our married days reminding each other of Your glory,
Your Gospel, Your love, Your Power, Your mission, and Your promise of what is to come.
I do highly recommend “You and me Forever.” It has less to do with marriage, and more to do with how to live in light of eternity. I first read it in Vietnam when I had no intention of getting married!
He Answers: A Renewing Ride
In retrospect, it is amazing to see all the little ways that God answers us when we call to Him. Our prayer is that we continue living a life submitted to God, where His grace flows in our lives, allowing us to abide in a place of peace, beauty and fruitfulness.
As we rode our bikes away from our wedding site, on to Sedona, I felt renewed. Maybe it was that coffee, maybe it was the bike ride, but the sunset was beautiful, and I was grateful.
Was this story encouraging?
How have you seen God crank the story of YOUR life?
Comment below!
